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jillybean
Joined: 01 Jul 2009
Posts: 9
Location: Chandler, AZ
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 Posted: Thu Jul 02, 2009 10:25 pm Post subject: Need help finding a balance with new pup.. |
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| Dexter has been her for 2 days and is adjusting well. He's very laid back and very cuddly.. We want to make sure we form a strong bond with him but he's starting to whine when we leave the room... We don't want to end up with him having separation anxiety.. what's the balance here? |
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morag
Mistress of the Cunning Plan
Joined: 03 Dec 2007
Posts: 10305
Location: Shropshire UK
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| Posted: Thu Jul 02, 2009 10:32 pm Post subject: |
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| I know others who have more experience will be able to give you better advice but mine would be to give affection and contact on your terms not the wee man's, make a point of not letting him follow you and ignore the whining no communication when he does it be it verbal or otherwise. Good luck hun. |
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jillybean
Joined: 01 Jul 2009
Posts: 9
Location: Chandler, AZ
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| Posted: Thu Jul 02, 2009 10:38 pm Post subject: |
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| How on Earth do I keep him from following me? |
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morag
Mistress of the Cunning Plan
Joined: 03 Dec 2007
Posts: 10305
Location: Shropshire UK
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| Posted: Thu Jul 02, 2009 10:48 pm Post subject: |
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Welll if you are going into another room shut the door, I don't mean always but just so he gets the idea. Again I'm sure more experienced folks will chime in with better advice.
Remember also as you say it's a balance and he's only just arrived with you so it's natural for them to want to be with you for comfort and security it's a fine line.
Sorry I'm not a lot of help. |
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puffornot
Top Dog!!!!
Joined: 25 Aug 2007
Posts: 3994
Location: oregon sweet oregon
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| Posted: Thu Jul 02, 2009 11:23 pm Post subject: |
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| Number one rule with puppies and children (not that I know anything about children) - distraction/substitution (there is a word for this I can't think of of course...). Give the pup something yummy (i.e. a puppy Kong with a little peanut butter or cheese whiz in it) when you leave. |
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cesarmonkey
Guest
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| Posted: Fri Jul 03, 2009 7:53 pm Post subject: |
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And lots and lots of exercise so little one is tuckered out and doesn't care where you are!  |
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Mari Becker
Best in Show
Joined: 22 Oct 2007
Posts: 1736
Location: Minnetonka, MN
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| Posted: Sat Jul 04, 2009 1:56 pm Post subject: |
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Practice with very short absences at first - like leave the room for just a minute and if he's quiet, go back and give him lots of praise. Just extend the time a tiny bit at a time. It's all about praising good behavior so you don't have to scold for bad. It's way easier to teach the positive than to undo the negative. But tiny steps are best, this way you are really showing him what it is you want - otherwise he has no clue.
Are you using a crate? I would suggest it if you are not. You can pop him in his crate with a little treat or bully stix, giving him something to do while you are gone for a moment and then praise tons when you come back and he's been quiet. Also, never let him out of the crate when he is crying - wait for him to quiet, even if for a moment, so he doesn't learn that crying gets him out of his crate or gets you to come back in the room.
Some internet searches on crate training or avoiding seperation anxiety might be helpful for you.
Good Luck and he's sure a cutie. |
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jillybean
Joined: 01 Jul 2009
Posts: 9
Location: Chandler, AZ
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| Posted: Sun Jul 05, 2009 1:58 pm Post subject: |
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We are using a crate.. It's getting to the point to if he can still see us in the next room but can't get to us (a baby gate) he'll whine. We never encourage this behavior. We never coddle him or pay any attention to him when he's whining. We never let him out of the crate when he's whining either.
He started whining/crying/barking in his crate at 6am this morning. He hadn't drank any water or eaten before bed last night.. He just wanted to be with us. He was in our room and could clearly see us. We really don't want a 6am walk to become a habit, but at the same time, he is just a puppy... What's the right thing to do here? Give in and let him out and take him outside, or listen to him bark for 90 minutes until it's our normal time to get up?
But just in general, he doesn't play much... If we let him, he'd be laying on us most of the day.
We're discouraging that today... not letting him be near us constantly.. forcing him to stay on the floor and entertain himself.
What else is there? We need a specific plan of attack to curb the whining/barking and help him be more indepenant.. We go back to work this week and he'll be alone for 7-8 hours 3 days per week.
We plan on having some one come in for a bathroom break but he's still going to be alone.. |
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ColleenT
Fairy Dogmother
Joined: 21 Nov 2008
Posts: 5926
Location: Poconos USA
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| Posted: Sun Jul 05, 2009 4:26 pm Post subject: |
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| always take him out when he cries, but no cuddling. then immediately put him back into his crate and go back to bed. puppies cannot hold their bladder as long as adults, so if he does go pee outside. Praise him and then he can have kisses, but still go back to bed. |
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hlboyz
QueenLaQuintli
Joined: 10 Jan 2006
Posts: 11921
Location: Paradise
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| Posted: Sun Jul 05, 2009 4:58 pm Post subject: |
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Cresteds are notoriously clingy, particularly the hairless males. They generally need to be with their human. I might look into some doggie daycare rather than leaving him alone all day even if he is being let out to go potty. But you are going to have to let him be with you most of the time when you are around or you will have a very unhappy male nekkie. It can be almost claustrophobic at first!!! I most certainly still remember that part even though I am used to it after many years.
Be sure there is plenty of stimulation when he is alone.... nothing like toys and chewies and things like that to help amuse them when you cannot - but be sure you trust the things you leave with them if not supervising - cresties can sometimes think they are part python!
It's only been a few days so am sure time will help. Many new pups in the home and of various breeds are very people oriented and their humans have this same issue - be patient, no worries. If he has been outside to potty and sufficiently and recently - do it ALOT at first so you know it isn't a potty issue - you are going to have to ignore those early morning cries for a little while. |
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jillybean
Joined: 01 Jul 2009
Posts: 9
Location: Chandler, AZ
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| Posted: Sun Jul 05, 2009 5:37 pm Post subject: |
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| We don't mind him wanting to be with us at all, but I don't want it to get to the point where he's miserable if he can't be with us. He's such a sweet baby.. |
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hlboyz
QueenLaQuintli
Joined: 10 Jan 2006
Posts: 11921
Location: Paradise
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| Posted: Mon Jul 06, 2009 8:33 am Post subject: |
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Understandable for sure. He should gain confidence in time, but keeping him at bay to "teach" him independence is not always a good thing at this early stage, you may be creating an anxious dog who craves attention and starts acting out. Just a thought. You are already setting boundaries for him with the crate and doggy gates, so this is being established and a good thing. Male hl cresties are not known for being independent... They don't call them the "most emotionally needy dog breed ever...." or something like that. LOL Anyhow, maybe taking a step back and looking at it from HIS perspective might be helpful - new place, people, situation - of course he is feeling insecure. Could it be that right now, giving him as much of your time - letting him lay all over you when you are at home hehehe just like he would prefer - would be a very GOOD thing to get him comfortable and at ease, for when you will be going back to work? I think that is the reasoning behind having time off when one gets a new pup - of any breed - at least ideally. No matter what, it's still going to be cold turkey the day he won't have you all to himself....
Am sure it will sort itself out for your sweetie. Just tossing some ideas out here which you can sort through.... consider, use - or not. |
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Mari Becker
Best in Show
Joined: 22 Oct 2007
Posts: 1736
Location: Minnetonka, MN
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| Posted: Mon Jul 06, 2009 5:50 pm Post subject: |
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Good Advice, hlboyz. They don't call them Velcro dogs for nothing!  |
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desolo_amour
House Broken
Joined: 01 Jul 2009
Posts: 133
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| Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 10:36 pm Post subject: |
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| I heard somewhere (might have been animal planet lol) that if you leave the radio or a TV on while your away it helps relax animals with separation anxiety. I'm not sure if it would help prevent t but it's always worth a shot. I'm going to be trying it once I get my babies. |
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